Elijah was "officially" one month old yesterday. Kind of depressing, but exciting all at the same time. He's growing so fast and I know these days have gone with the wind. I'll never get them back. I wish I could just stop time for a day or more. He's so precious to me. This morning, he woke up and gave me a big smile. Talk about stealing Momma's heart all over again. He ended up giving me two smiles, but there's nothing like that first smile. Poor Chris, he's only heard about the smiles, but hasn't gotten to see one yet. I know he'd love to.
I was thinking about all the changes that Elijah has brought to our home. Everyone told us our lives would "change" But no one ever pinpointed exactly what would change. (Kind of like Obama - change is coming! But WHAT change? LOL) And they all finished the sentence with "but it's worth it!" So here's just a few changes - in case anyone ever asks me...
Diapers - they don't stop after one or two changes. Get prepared. And who decided on the standard height of a changing table? I'm short, but my changing table kills my back. I have to slightly bend to reach Elijah - by the end of the diaper change, I need a chiropractor! But I digress. Oh... and has anyone ever told you that yellow poo and light blue clothing = green stains?
Sleep - rather the lack of sleep. No one actually told me that I would get used to only 5-6 hours of sleep a night - on a good night. They also didn't tell me the 5-6 hours are broken up by multiple feedings and/or fussiness. They all said "Sleep when baby sleeps" but they failed to mention how you must let everything else (housework, bills, dinner, etc) in order to get the sleep during baby's sleep.
Breastfeeding - I thought I had mentally prepared myself for the huge commitment of breastfeeding. But, it really hadn't sunk in that once you start, there's no stopping. It's round the clock, often demanded, without any patience for your own missed dinners and loss of bathroom breaks.
Vocal abilities - no one mentioned I would no longer be capable of holding a normal conversation. I now speak in a high pitched, sing-songy, voice and my words end in "y". Example: "Hey there Buddy... do you need your diapy changed? Let me get a diapy and the wipeys."
Clumsiness - no one mentioned how clumsy I would become. It started while I was still pregnant. I'd loose my balance occasionally. No big deal; I was dealing with a huge belly. But I'm not pregnant now and I've become an overall clumsy, klutzy person. I walk funny to keep my balance. I'm constantly dropping things. Perhaps I'm now called to be a clown?
So before anyone gets the big idea that "Nettie's not happy" or "Nettie's having issues" please re-read this and see the humor. I'm only teasing. Do I agree with all those people who said my life would change? Yes. My life has changed. Do I agree that it's all worth it? Yes. It's so worth it. Being a parent is probably life's biggest challenge - but also one of life's most rewarding challenges. I see changes in me and changes in Chris. But having Elijah has made our family complete. (Not saying there aren't more children in our future - I'm just hoping they're not in our NEAR future!) And just for the record... I wouldn't change a thing except the C-section. I know the Lord is in control of ALL things, but I would love to have been able to experience this without the C-section. (Why? 'Cause I'm a big wimp - I don't 'do' pain!)
There is one more thing nobody fully warned me about: love. No one told me I'd be so head-over-heals in love with this new little person that I wouldn't mind the lack of sleep or the diapers or the commitment to breastfeed. No one told me that my heart would break when his tummy hurts from gas. Or how the thought of leaving him to go back to work could send me spiraling into the deepest of depressions. Or how I'd be so afraid to miss one minute of his life because I might miss something new. Or how my heart would nearly burst with pride and the love I feel for him. Yes, my life has changed, and, thank God, will never be the same again.
A quick story about Elijah - I got quite a kick out of him this morning. I think most of you know Elijah and I are sleeping in the guest room to let Daddy get more rest. It's a temporary situation. Anyways, last night Elijah was a bit restless so I had ended up letting him sleep with me. This morning at his 6:00 feeding, he ended up falling back to sleep instead of finishing eating. I put him back to bed with hopes to get another hour of sleep. Well, in a few minutes he started waking up looking to finish eating. I sorta propped myself up on my elbow/hand to watch him and to tend to him. He wiggled and grunted himself over to me (half asleep the entire time) and put his little mouth up to my elbow! He didn't root or try to latch on, just put his mouth against my skin and fell right back to sleep. I guess he just needed that connection more than anything.
BTW: Happy birthday to my cousin, Amber! I hadn't forgot you, it just takes me longer to get things posted these days.
I hope you're not tired of hearing about my man. If you are, to bad. LOL